How to Catch a Cold
Some people seem to expect a bout with a cold or the flu each year. If you haven’t had your quota yet, here are some things you can do:
Eat a poor diet. If you want to catch a cold, make sure your body lacks the vitamins and minerals it needs to keep itself in good repair. Eat lots of processed foods, stripped of their nutritional value.
Avoid adequate rest. Deprive yourself of adequate rest. Stay up late and reduce the time you sleep as much as possible. Use tobacco, coffee and other stimulants to fool yourself into thinking you have plenty of energy.
Stop exercising. Reduce the effectiveness of your immune and lymphatic systems. Unlike the circulatory system, your lymphatic system depends upon exercise and movement to circulate these germ-fighting fluids.
Rarely wash your hands. Increase your chances of catching a cold by compromising your personal hygiene. Remember to use your dirty hands and fingers to rub your eyes, pick your nose or wipe your lips.
Think negative thoughts. Look for opportunities to visualize having a cold. Pay attention to news reports about outbreaks of the flu and pay close attention to advertising that sells medications for cold sufferers.
Invite stress. Stress yourself physically by experiencing extreme temperature and humidity changes. Stress yourself mentally with constant worry or fear.
Become dehydrated. Avoid drinking enough water. Reduce the effectiveness of your natural defense mechanisms and other bodily functions by avoiding fluids.
Forget your appointments. Ignore your nervous system, the master control of your immune system. Avoid these preventive strategies and shun our suggestions of periodic chiropractic checkups to help you stay well.
Of course we’re joking! The only way to catch a cold or the flu is to make yourself a hospitable host to the millions of cold and flu germs around you every day. Include regular chiropractic care to keep you working at your very best.
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